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Main » 2023 » Zeptember » 10 » Crapser On Crutches, Head Mummified
2:45 PM
Crapser On Crutches, Head Mummified

z32
 

Negotiations between Lucas Racing team owner Dalton Lucas and the Extravaganza Series 25-man panel began on Saturday morning, attempting to work out an agreement in case Alex Crapser failed one of his injury protocol's before the Bristol Night race on Friday. Lucas waved checks rumored to be in the Millions, flung around his favorite $2 dollar bill collection, and even offered Jeremy Pringle part ownership in the Lucas Hauling corporation. The panel denied every dollar price, but the two sides finally came to an agreement on Saturday night. Lucas sold his ownership to the Little Ceasar's at Goose Creek, South Carolina. In turn, the Extravaganza panel has agreed to re-locate the chain inside the Extravaganza Series Hall of Fame, and let Alex Crapser race if he passed a brain test.


Crapser was forced to stare at a pendulum swing for six hours on Sunday, locked inside one of Extravaganza's "Protocol Dungeons". "It was a torture chamber. I knew if I screamed once they wouldn't let me back in the car." said Crapser. "Puss flew out of my eye sockets. Blood secreting from both nostrils. My tonsils fell off at one point, but I kept on trucking." Despite multiple stints of quintuple vision and momentary bouts of blindness, Crapser passed the test and is a 50-50 shot to make the Sharpie 500. He and his team took a trip to the local supermarket by camper van in celebration, to get some ibuprofen and "Branned Flakes", his favorite meal. "My Winnebago looks like a kaleidoscope" said Crapser. His brother Adam informed him it was a mailbox.


Crapser also endures a broken left leg from the accident, as well as severe pelvis swelling. "The doctor's told me not to race for the rest of the season. I agree with them, but we'll see how I'm feeling come Friday." Lucas Racing Bonanza driver Molemar Diggs, as well as ARCA Bonzai regular and former crew chief Jeremy Hebel will be ready to take over the ride if need-be.
 

Category: NORL AI Extravaganza | Views: 76 | Added by: anthonypiazza88888
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